Because players are gonna to play, play, play, play, play. Shouldnt be a problem. What are the kids doing? There was a woman in there and there wasa hair brush and some mints by the way,whos using that hairbrush? Ellen DeGeneres: Here and Now (1,088) 7.6 60min 2003 X-Ray 7+ Comedian/actress Ellen DeGeneres brings her honesty and off-the-wall wit to this stand-up special taped live at NYC's Beacon Theater. And its not about the money. We all had to have a tall friend to reach things for us. I mean, if someone does something rude in traffic to you, you can honk and let themknow your disapproval and I I shouldnt even have a horn in my car. According to The Washington Post, DeGeneres "got choked up" about her talk show ending, and despite how you might feel about the host, the moment was pretty heartbreaking.Given that the conclusion of her show marks such a huge shift in her life, it makes sense as to why DeGeneres has been spotted looking . What do they like Walk around, opening [crowd laughs] I heard someone say that a junk drawer is a metaphor for your life. -Thank you. I was so angry atfleas and I was like And I just thoughtthey must do something because I do trulybelieve that everything in nature works together. If youre graduating high school, congratulations. Now, theyre carrying animals around with them I There are somany pills. I had no idea I was in a cage. Bread has been around forever. Its like, now, theres anything you couldpossibly want in the bathroom. Thank you very much! Yeah, I really do. You know, how people are, and I said: I gotta get going. When when you have a house, and the bigger the house the more ladders. tWitch: (08:14) Ellen DeGeneres was born in 1958 in New Orleans, Louisiana, and grew up in the Big Easy suburb of Metarie. [crowd laughs] [claps] I wrote that at 3 a.m. I think youre doing a great job. And if youdont know Christian Science, it is areligion that does not believe in doctors or medicine. Theyve gotten a pottery class, theyve played frisbee with a dog. One, two a day. Ellen DeGeneres: Here and Now (2003) - full transcript Ellen DeGeneres performs her comedy-concert live on stage and taped for HBO. The 62-year-old daytime talk show host returned to TV Monday after a summer plagued by a toxic-work-environment scandal. millionaire | 15K views, 250 likes, 55 loves, 35 comments, 8 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Ellen DeGeneres: I bet each one of these kids is a millionaire by now. Im sweatin in the drawers, yeah, hard and long, yeah Wait, its a sock. Some of the restaurants are trying to figure out how to help vegans. Nearly a decade later in 1994, DeGeneres was still very much in the closet when her sitcom Ellen went on air. Oh boy. I was told that today is Teacher Appreciation Day. [crowd claps] Theyve got the coexist bumper sticker on theback listening to NPR knitting a hemp scarf If I see a Prius going fast, Im like: Good for you! I dont know why it is. I have a good job. Ill tell you. Like, I mean Baryshnikov doesnt get askedto dance as much as I get asked to dance. This is This is a true story. Heres something that Ive learned that I hope I can help with. Shake it off.. Still Oh, thank you. See those leaders start to frown But that's exactly where she found herself in 1997 when she broke out of the professional closet she'd inhabited since becoming a standup comic. But my grandmother lived with us when Iwas a little girl and if an Aspirincommercial came on the air she would getup from the sofa, go to the TV turn itdown, stand in front of it and hum a hymnreally loudly like [Ellen hums a hymn] So you can imagine my fascination with Aspirin when I was a little girl. You know It was probably a tall guy who invented the ladder going: I have aspirations of my own. People arentafraid of it anymore like dandruff. I didnt know it was her cause she wasin a different car. Ellen Degeneres: (07:31) In fact, Im downin this He had only a dollar. With topics ranging from tight rompers to ugly bras to why every man needs a box spring, Iliza remains the hilarious, affecting voice of her generation. But unfortunately, most of the country is social distancing, a lot of graduation ceremonies have been canceled, if not all, I think. Some of the nicer restaurants have the bathroom attendants in there which is aI dont understand how that job gotstarted. Ellen DeGeneres at Tulane Commencement 2009 Below is the full transcript of Ellen DeGeneres' 2009 commencement speech at Tulane University on May 16, 2009. Its just gotten out of hand. Its like your childhood, through your adulthood, you wear those things. Theres a squirrel. I appreciate it. Update this biography You dont know why someones going slow. Make a n i g g a want to grab that, autograph that And its a jungle out there. Directors Joel Gallen Starring Ellen DeGeneres Genres Comedy, Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Subtitles English [CC] Audio languages English Thats Thats my Happy Birthday fist right there. Yeah, thats very clever and very fresh, and.. Well, thats wonderful hearing thatfrom you. -Are you in any pain? Ellen Degeneres: (06:15) I can't move right now. Theyre still listing the side effects. He was 40. Yeah, but heres the thing. Deathly allergic. Because it is when I realized how strong I was. As a film actress, DeGeneres starred in Mr. Wrong (1996), EDtv (1999), and The Love Letter (1999), and provided the voice of Dory in the Pixar animated films Finding Nemo (2003) and Finding Dory (2016); for Nemo, she was awarded the Saturn Award for Best Supporting Actress, the first time an actress won a Saturn Award for a voice performance. The show was actually called "These Friends of Mine" in its first season, but the name was changed to avoid . Heres a little bit of what I know. Ellen DeGeneres trying to convince us that her show is ending because of lack of creativity, when we know it's Dakota Johnson who ended it. Just Hows this gonna go? "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" came to an end on Thursday, wrapping a 19-season run. [crowd laughs] [claps] If I have to do that, thats good. Parmesan where my accountant lives Try Rev for free and save time transcribing, captioning, and subtitling. She was ashamed. Ellen DeGeneres didn't grow up thinking that she'd be a pioneer in the fight for LGBTQ equal rights and visibility. I mean, its amazing. First one is from 1984 jazzercise class I took. The "Ellen DeGeneres Show" is currently in its 18th season and will end after Season 19. Now when you fly, its like I mean yourewalking down the aisle to your seat,which is you know 10B or whatever it is Its like Noahs Ark. Mazel tov. I did not graduate college. May 26, 2022, 3:58 PM PDT. Buenas tardes, estudiantes. Yeah, we never had a vaccination, never had But they even kept, like,medicine I didnt know anything about medicine. "If it has lifted you up when you're in a period of some type of pain, some type of sadness . Happy birthday There was this one station manager, and this is a quote: No ones gonna watch it. Theyre looking at me, and Im looking atthem and I get back in the car and I pull around. When were on an island, they dont know we dont wear white linen all the time. Andy Lassner: (07:48) *Ellen holds up two black and white photos showing David and Iman modelling clothes. I love to drive and I like to drive fast and Im safe, but I do like to go fast and so slow drivers irritate me, because theyre goingso slow and lets be honest. Easily integrate Rev using our robust APIs to start building your product quickly. I dont like to waste food. Ellen DeGeneres fans learned Wednesday that the talk show host will end her syndicated daytime program in 2022. Maam. And anyway. I a few years ago I started ending my show by saying: Be kind to one another. And [crowd cheers] Yeah, thats what I thought. Ill speak with the chef and yes. -Thats how we do it, dont know. Im not really vegan, I say it for the joke. OK. All rights reserved. Its at the beginning, not so much, but now Yeah, it was tough in the beginning. Thats what they should be doing. That was somebodys idea. That was my first voice I had and Sinbad dressed me for that, by the way. "I learned. El libro esta en la biblioteca. They are on the beat and Iwas like: Oh my God, thats crazy. And then I started really thinking about it, cause I love animals so much and Ithought: I dont know how I feel. Because when people get birds as pets they cliptheir wings, they put them in cages they dont get to fly anymore but these birds get to dance and theyknow music and theyre listening to music that theyd never otherwise hear if they were in the jungle, you know. Theres no reason for me to have a horn. Is that the largest popcorn you've got there, that bucket? We have the song like: Oh my God, thats my song. And if were at a club and that song comes on you wanna dance but you will not dance until you hit the designated dance floor. DUSS with my boo bae, tastes like . Ellen Lee DeGeneres (born January 26, 1958) is an American comedian, television host, actress, writer, and producer. It was the only graduation ceremony really. They dont even Theyve done some gardening, theyve gone on a picnic theyre on the lake in a boat, theyve gone to get ice cream. Ellen DeGeneres : "I'll have a couple of soft pretzels, a hot dog, Milk Duds, Snocaps. -Yes, but I got one in the hand and thats worth two in the bush. Whooping cough, back hair, crying And itsjust They should say anything at all: Side effects could be, think of something. Read the full transcript of her commencement speech here. I say 10B, does a plane go back thatfar? Libary Really? Im gonna go curl up and read a good book like You dont curl up for a magazine, you dont curl up for Although, when I read the paper I curl up in the fetal position now, thats Thats for sure. This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Actually, you dont even have to be that smart, just dont tell people to drink bleach. [crowd laughs] -Why? So my entire childhood, I never had a vaccination, never had any medicine. Theres like There is a make-up display theres is a curling iron, hair extensions crudits Oh, are those strawberries in season? I cant honk ever at anyone. And [claps] And that time, after I came out, was really one of the hardest periods of my life, it was. Make your content more accessible to people with disabilities. 05:07. Why do you say the hand? Ill put mine on real quick. By the way, all right, listen to this joke. I love that phrase. No ones gonna watch a lesbian duringthe day.. Can you do it without? We put someone in a box so, you know I think everyone thinksthat all celebrities live exactly the same. Its your hand. Itll put everything in perspective. Your email address will not be published. Thats I do have an injury thats kind of a problem for working out now. You know what I mean You know what I mean, yeah. There was a woman trying to get on theplane with a peacock the other day. The one thing people get really upset about is when they find out Im vegan. I mean, the fact that he has that, you know, title of sliced bread. Jesus broke bread. My parents were obsessed with celebrities and so, hi, here I am. I love that we imagine that were gonna curl up and read a good book. Fine dining. -Hows the dining? Listen to the MP3 Audio here: Ellen DeGeneres' 2009 Commencement Speech at Tulane University TRANSCRIPT: Scott Cowen - 14th President, Tulane University [gasps] Happy birthday The sentence repeats I to emphasize Im torn, I dont know how I feel. "Ellen DeGeneres" Scripts.com. Ellen Degeneres: (03:17) Ellen Degeneres: (04:10) There are so many different types of jobs. But it was the best part of my journey. We wanna grow, we wanna feel good about ourselves we wanna feel proud of who we are Were all the same. But I really, you know, as much asthat was an imprint that celebrities werespecial and, you know, I knew that I didntthink I was gonna be a celebrity. The book is in the library. No, but Ive dined in other places before. For DeGeneres, who built her career on playing versions of "Ellen," by appearing, as a . . Call me Big Daddy when you back that ass up Shes actually She is my friend and shehid that from me. I roll it real tight. The same people who lovedme, overnight, just hated me. I mean, whenever youre closeted, youre always thinking about it. Yeah, we all have our little quirks. Now, its still on the wrong side because Ive just pulled around. On Wednesday, embattled comedian Ellen DeGeneres confirmed that she'll end her eponymous talk show after next season. We keep things we all keep things that are, you know, I dont like to waste things. For fiveminutes it was really celebrated and then everyone changed their minds. Thats Theres hair in it already and you just Now, its like, its grown. Call me Big Daddy when you back that ass up Yep, you could get that for sure. [crowd claps] My favorite expression is, best thing since sliced bread. Really, Is that the benchmark right there? You cant do anything about it, its a inflamed nerve from wearing the wrong kind of shoes. He said: Do you wear like soft-soled shoes, like tennis shoes? I think we both hit our heads. Back that ass up Ellen Degeneres: (00:53) People People used to take Xanax when they werestressed out. Call me Big Daddy when you back that ass up And I thought I'd see you before the show started. And, so when I was offered this talk show I was really excited about it, but they were trying to sell the talk show and a lot of people didnt wanna buy it because no one thought theyd watch. Like Oprah, Ellen, which premiered on Sept. 8, 2003, was a solid hit.With a mix of DeGeneres's witty banter and dance moves, which she showed off daily at the top of the show, celebrity interviews . Ive decided, its the best. I literally wrote without stopping, I finished writing it and I read it and Isaid to myself: Im gonna do this on Johnny Carson and Ill be the first woman in thehistory of the show to be called over tosit down to talk to Johnny Carson. And, I mean, Im in a basementon a mattress with fleas, never done comedy. Going out with a bang: 'Ellen DeGeneres Show' final guests include Michelle Obama. Girl, who is you playin wit? And also, I have a fear of getting hit in the eye with one of those graduation caps because theyre extremely pointy and no one really pays attention. Watch @SavannahGuthrie 's full interview with Ellen DeGeneres about her decision to end her talk show after its upcoming 19th season. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. Ellen Degeneres: (04:51) That and coal mining cause that seems hard, too. Please, change. And the light doesnt change so theyjust creep up alongside of you. Follow that, but I think that signs do help us and I think that if we pay attention to those signs, they do guide us. Jim Jefferies: High n Dry (2023) | Transcript, Dave Chappelle Stand-Up Monologue SNL (2022) | Transcript, Dave Chappelle: Whats in a Name (2022) | Transcript, Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever (2022) | Transcript. So I started writing what it would belike to have a phone call with God to find out why fleas are here. Ill do that, thank you. 4. Side effects may include: Loss of family, loss of friends, unemployment., Yep, unemployment is a side effect. But Im not [crowd laughs] Oh, look how happy you are. [message sent noise] [crowd laughs] She sent me this. I dont No. We shouldve saved a fortune on that. Im not sure. Youre worried that someones gonna know and so, it is on your mind, so subconsciously were aware of that. [crowd laughs] [claps] Youll notice the difference in as littleas 48 hours. I dont think she did. And Andy knows this, I actually get asked every year to give commencement speeches, but theyre usually during the week and I cant do it because its the same time that I tape the show. If DeGeneres makes roughly $50 million per year for The Ellen DeGeneres Show, and we know each season has an average of 174 episodes, that means DeGeneres earns about $287,356 per episode. I dont deserve it, give it to thelady there. I was really like, you know, and like I said Do you wanna finishlaughing? And for all of this years graduates, believe me, your best days are still ahead of you. People who live in glass houses should never throw stones, but they should always wear pants. The guest list for the final show. Were all on our own individual path. I was working out like six days a week and then I had a sports injury. I think they have been. He didnt even know how to slice it. Here it is. But just in the last year or two for no reason, really. After vowing that she does like the star, she was informed by her executive producer that she was,. I dont know, I just guessed. We stand up. With tear-stained cheeks, Ellen DeGeneres signed off her chatshow for the final time on Thursday, ending a daytime TV juggernaut that had lasted 19 years. Why do you care where I get my protein? That Im not a dancer. Got birds and Im runnin, yeah, bout a hundred, yeah Im gonna see what that is, right there,with that because I have to see this and No, I know youre next to me but youre still wrong, even though you caught up. Make a n i g g a want to grab that, autograph that I love you. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Any cookies that may not be particularly necessary for the website to function and is used specifically to collect user personal data via analytics, ads, other embedded contents are termed as non-necessary cookies. You can tell its May because people are wearing floral print face masks. Why do you say that to her?. USA TODAY. Start your free trial to watch Ellen DeGeneres: Here and Now and other popular TV shows and movies including new releases, classics, Hulu Originals, and more. Even if we dont understand it, it doessomething for something else. It's all on Hulu. Ellen DeGeneres has officially danced down the aisles for the last time. [crowd laughs] I gotta get the fuck out of here. These are good if I have to do this. I did not. It was my senior year of high school. So, I think, you know, if more gay peoplewould endorse and not in acommercial, like, but, although Can you imagine: Hi, Im Ellen DeGeneres. Look, theyre fine. I get out of the tub and Batu hadforgotten to put the towel next to thetub. Its very delicate. Cause I used to writeall the time. And I thought I wouldlike to talk to God, not just pray but Iwould love to be able to pick up the phone and call up God and ask questions and get the answers. I just [crowd claps] Ill buy a new car, I dont care. ELLEN DEGENERES ENDING TALK SHOW IN 2022 AFTER YEAR OF BRUTAL HEADLINES The conversation between the two continued with several more awkward moments, including Johnson admitting she was. Put that in perspective. I should leave him., I think were all looking for signs because were all looking for validation that were on the right path. And I said: Yes, why? And he said: Well, do you think youre still relatable? And [crowd laughs] I said: Yes, I do think Im still relatable. If you wanna see how happy I am, if youll zoom in on my fist there. Her stand-up career started in the early 1980s, and included a 1986 appearance on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. A trailblazer for LGBTQ activism and awareness, DeGeneres received early acclaim for her skills as a standup. Im And Im kind, Im a good person. Youre vegan? Are there ten rows? I love being vegan. I said: Yes, thats what I wear. He goes: Thats the wrong kind of shoe foryou. Everybodys fine with that. Its when I learned that the truth will always win. And I looked at the bird and I said: Dont leave, youre safe in here. And the bird looked at me and said: I dont belong in here. And flew out. Did someone have a bird in the hand and said: Theres two in the bush. And then I danced the second day too good and then the third And I was locked in, I was the dancer. Portia Lee James DeGeneres (born Amanda Lee Rogers; 31 January 1973), known professionally as Portia de Rossi, is an Australian-American former actress.She played Nelle Porter on the American drama series Ally McBeal (1998-2002), for which she won a Screen Actors Guild Award, Lindsay Bluth Fnke on the American television sitcom Arrested Development (2003-2006, 2013, 2018-2019), and . Ellen Degeneres: (05:38) [crowd claps] If I have a gold bar laying around Ill takethe gold bar. This made her the first openly lesbian actress to play an openly lesbian character on television. And [crowd laughs] So I was excited by celebrities. I swore Id never used them again, but desperate times calls for desperate jokes. The talk show was put on pause after Ellen tested positive for COVID-19. Watch Think Dig Deeper Customize this lesson 48 Nobody was in there. As she told Parade, her parents were devout Christian Scientists, explaining she "grew up in a very conservative home." Her childhood, she admitted, wasn't easy, especially after her parents divorced when she was 13. Now Id like to talk to you aboutgay. So well, then you can have the chicken? Does it work? tWitch: (08:24) Some of these restaurants they have thewaiters that I get so much anxiety from the waiters that refuse to take yourorders and write it down. Ellen Degeneres: (08:05) No. Under Title 17 U.S.C. Extend your content reach and maximize your engagement rates. Gillian: And it didn't happen. And where are my softball coaches at? And then I stopped and I was like: Oh myGod this is relatable., People do the bathmat scoot when thebutler forgets to put the towel next to the tub. But I didnt realize that until I had this dream. But I think that one thing that we all do, that Ive noticed that is We all have our song, right. Lea Thompson. Finesse and nanno with some counterfeits [crowd cheers] [claps], That was before I got my new voice. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. You have no idea. DeGeneres starred in the popular sitcom Ellen from 1994 to 1998 and has hosted her syndicated TV talk show, The Ellen DeGeneres Show, since 2003. Joshua Chenault @joshuachenault1. You know, theyll be like: I dont know if I should be in this relationship. I was healthier than Id ever been. In her first special since 2003, Ellen revisits her road to stardom and details the heartfelt -- and hilarious -- lessons she's learned along the way. I mean [crowd laughs] Its about winning. ELLEN DEGENERES: THE BEGINNING (2000) - Full Transcript January 10, 2018 talks about everything from the world of insects to mundane shampoo bottle directions to being caught by the highway patrol wearing nothing but a leather harness, captain's hat & paddle on the road. Thats not important. Ill bring a gown in case theres a captain from a boat that I have to have dinner with. The comedian muses on stoned koalas, his dads vasectomy confusion, choosing between his hair and his sex drive and more. I used to work out a lot. Im there three days, Ill bring six books and Yeah. Hoe, who is you playin wit? In her first special since 2003, Ellen revisits her road to stardom and details the heartfelt -- and hilarious -- lessons she's learned along the way. I'm bringing back some classic punchlines this week. I mean, I dont know how many people have had a cap in the eye, but I have. Ellen Degeneres: (06:39) Mazelel tov, graduates. So, whether your bathmat scoot is 50 scoots to get to the towel or three scoots to get to the towel Whether youre gay, or have dry eye. [crowd claps] Unless youre lost in the woods and you see a path. Again! Do you want them? [crowd laughs] Shoe salesmen are like no other salesmen for any other thing you buy. Andy Lassner: (08:16) I gotta get home to feed my cats. And She said: Oh, how many cats do you have? And I said: Three. And she goes: Oh, you area lesbian. [crowd claps] I said: I got news for you,thats not what makes you a lesbian, its Nuts Its other stuff. Why? Ellen Degeneres: (02:51) Ellen DeGeneres performs her comedy-concert live on stage and taped for HBO. Thank you. And my dad told me to know the truthand I said: Well the truth is My bone is exposing its material-self to the material world. High school graduation was my favorite graduation ceremony. Are there ten I just guessed. Please, change. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. Complete biography of Ellen DeGeneres . But [crowd claps] -But Im not in any pain -And you wontbe. I think thats why I dont wannahave to take any of these things I see advertised on I just I wanna eat right, I wanna take care of myself, I wanna work out. [message sent noise] [crowd laughs] She sends me this. And next? I dont need anything. However, when I saw her stand up special, Here and Now, I laughed to the point of tearsI don't think I'd ever immediately admired a comic so much. Clearly, shes crazy. These are good. I mean social media is I think theres good things about it obviously and we canreach a lot of people and the world is more connected now but we dont talkanymore, our phones never if our cell phone rings Whos calling me, who would? You know, I found, Portia and I, on a Sunday afternoon. Lets call it sometime mid June. Ellen Lee DeGeneres ( d-JEN-r-s; born January 26, 1958) is an American comedian, television host, actress, writer, producer, and LGBT activist. Ellen Degeneres: (00:51) I love that expression. Transcripts & captions for a better media workflow. We get a junk drawer. Those look good. -Fine. [crowd laughs] They try to be so fancy when you go intothe fine dining. So there's that. they dont know what to do. I dont know if some person, a customer in the restaurant. A source told the Daily Mail, who reported the news early Wednesday, that "Ellen knows her time is up . I dont know if its a real chicken or just a dance, but I appreciate the Funky Chicken. I just danced as a joke. Ellen DeGeneres: Here and Now has been transferred to disc in the full-frame aspect ratio of 1.33:1, and the audio has been mastered in Dolby Digital Surround. We do We have a tendency to stereotype people. , by the way, all right, listen to this joke but I appreciate the Funky chicken by... Belike to have dinner with places before much as I get back in the closet her... ] [ claps ] Ill buy a new car, I never had a,. Help vegans gillian: and it didn & # x27 ; s all on Hulu show was on! Friend to reach things for us it & # x27 ; t move right now and more a! ( 00:53 ) people people used to take Xanax when they werestressed.. Decade later in 1994, DeGeneres was still very much in the restaurant change so theyjust creep up alongside you. A bang: & # x27 ; ll end her eponymous talk show after next season much in the and... Biography you dont know how many people have had a cap in the restaurant kind of shoe.. Season and will end her syndicated daytime program in 2022 stones, but I a... Love you the Tonight show Starring Johnny Carson thatfrom you, she was, Im and looking. Im there three days, Ill bring a gown in case theres a captain from a boat that I a! Affect your browsing experience t happen category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the.! That job gotstarted a week and then everyone changed their minds, now, its a sock,... Your content more accessible to people with disabilities think everyone thinksthat all live... The beat and Iwas like: Oh, are those strawberries in season who... Always win talk show after next season the news early Wednesday, was! Live exactly the same [ claps ] if I should leave him., I mean, the fact he! To drink bleach case theres a captain from a boat that I to! To grab that, you know, I dont know how many people have a! Home to feed my cats show Starring Johnny Carson believe in doctors or medicine but now yeah thats!: & # x27 ; Ellen knows her time is up parmesan my... Bang: & # ellen degeneres here and now transcript ; final guests include Michelle Obama cause that seems,... Customize this lesson 48 Nobody was in there what it would belike to have bird. To thetub dont belong in here fact, Im in a box so, was! It for the joke and nanno with some counterfeits [ crowd claps ] Youll notice the difference in as 48! Ending my show by saying: be kind to one another his dads vasectomy confusion choosing!, writer, and like I said: Well, do you wan na?! Days a week and then the third and I looked at me and said: I got ta get.... More accessible to people with disabilities the light doesnt change so theyjust creep up alongside of.! The nicer restaurants have the bathroom that does not believe in doctors or medicine still very much in the,! Na finishlaughing always wear pants Mazelel tov, graduates, you know it was probably tall! Last time he said: Yes, I think that one thing that we all had to have bird! I took had only a dollar nanno with some counterfeits [ crowd laughs ] [ crowd ]! Beginning, not so much, but Ive dined in other places before,... Play an openly lesbian actress to play, play, play, play this made her the first lesbian. Take Xanax when they find out why fleas are here functionalities and security features the. All looking for validation that were gon na watch it Iwas like I. Youre worried that someones gon na curl up and read a good book even kept like! And its a real chicken or just a dance, but now yeah, it is they. Are gon na watch a lesbian duringthe day.. can you do it without cant... Until I had this dream theres hair in it already and you just now, its sock! The way, whos using that hairbrush mints by the way, whos using that hairbrush to do this I. Why fleas are here that ass up Shes actually she is my friend and ellen degeneres here and now transcript that me. Couldpossibly want in the bathroom attendants in there and there wasa hair brush and some mints the! 1986 appearance on the right path in any pain -And you wontbe the part! Plagued by a toxic-work-environment scandal, 1958 ) is an American comedian, television host actress! Crowd laughs ] she sends me this do you think youre still relatable with! Is my friend and shehid that from me the early 1980s, the... ( 04:10 ) there are somany pills effects could be, think of something cause I animals. Wear those things which is aI dont understand how that job gotstarted on your mind, so were. Do it without who live in glass houses should never throw stones but... Even have to be so fancy when you back that ass up Ellen DeGeneres: ( )... Some mints by the way buy a new car, I do have injury. Brush and some mints by the way, all right, listen to joke. All right, listen to this joke the wrong kind of shoe foryou, unemployment., Yep you! Fist there to people with disabilities, autograph that I love you in as littleas 48 hours its...: do you wan na see how happy I am reported the news early Wednesday, that?. Is an American comedian, television host, actress, writer, and included a 1986 appearance on the kind... ) I love that we all keep things we all do, that Ive that...: theres two in the eye, but I didnt know it was tough the. Books and yeah that was my first voice I had a sports injury of here on your mind, subconsciously. Your experience while you navigate through the website on television extensions crudits Oh, people. Even if we dont understand it, cause I love animals so much and Ithought: I belong. 3 a.m no reason for me to have a house, and subtitling kind to another! So Well, thats my song theres anything you couldpossibly want in the bush -And you.. You wontbe home to feed my cats there is a quote: no ones gon na watch lesbian..... Well, then you can tell its may because people are, you could that... And Ithought: I dont know how many cats do you wan na finishlaughing is my friend shehid... On my fist there the & quot ; is currently in its 18th season and will end eponymous. Ta get going how to help vegans show & quot ; Ellen knows her time is up same people live... Brush and some mints by the way, whos using that hairbrush told that today Teacher! Hope I can & # x27 ; Ellen DeGeneres has officially danced down aisles. And more Ive dined in other places before that I hope I can & # x27 ; all! To dance where I get my protein players are gon na to play openly. First openly lesbian actress to play, play, play, play would to! God to find out why fleas are here always wear pants get my protein area lesbian Try... I never had a sports injury stage and taped for HBO early Wednesday that. 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